Book Review: Unlocking Your Family Patterns

by Dr. Henry Cloud, Dr. John Townsend, Dave Carder, and Dr. Earl Henslin

Do you suffer from an abusive or conflicted family past? This book is for you. Do you come from a completely normal family that did everything right? This book is for you. We may think that only some families are cursed with anguish or abuse, but the fact is that we are all human, and we are all fallen. Unlocking Your Family Patterns begins by examining three families in the Bible: David’s, Isaac’s, and Jesus’ families. We see in the first two how righteous men had harmful family patterns that were repeated for generations, and the pain and broken relationships that resulted. We also see an example of how Jesus resisted the fallen nature of man (remember, His earthly parents were fallen and struggled with sin just like the rest of us) and did not allow the earthly nature of his well-meaning parents rub off on Him. Jesus is looked to as an example in many ways, and His interactions with family are no exception.

The book describes patterns and modes of communication common in many families, whether Christian or non-Christian. The authors stress the importance of healing from a dysfunctional family past in order to “break the cycle” and not repeat your parents mistakes. Naturally, no one is perfect or we would have all had a perfect upbringing. It is important to realize when reading this book that our parents meant well and did the best they could, and reading the book won’t make us all perfect parents to our children. However, the more harmful patterns are worth avoiding repetition and this book gives guidelines for how to avoid repeating those patterns.

I found Unlocking Your Family Patterns to be very eye-opening and helpful. This is definitely a book that will stay on my shelf and garner a few more reads when I start my own family!

I received this book for free from the publisher through the Moody Publishers blogger review program. I was not required to write a positive review and the opinions and thoughts I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255